In February 2024, I returned home to Los Angeles after the adventure of a lifetime: exploring 18 countries across South America and Asia in 18 months on a trip that cost me $34,000. I had quit my dream job as a video journalist to heal my burnout and find happiness beyond traditional measures of success and prestige.
When it was over, I went from chasing waterfalls in Indonesia and whizzing through the rolling green countryside of Vietnam on a motorbike to staring at my computer screen at home, watching the job rejections roll in.
In some ways, I felt more lost than ever.
I’d jumped back in the job market at a particularly tough moment, as thousands of journalists were getting laid off. The future of my career and income were uncertain. That’s a scary feeling at 34, when you often feel pressured to buy a house, have kids, and save up for retirement.
These circumstances would have made me unhappy and ashamed a few years ago. I no longer had the cool job or the epic, Instagrammable life around which my self-worth used to revolve. Instead, I was home and unemployed.
But my sabbatical taught me four key lessons about happiness that helped keep me positive, confident, and self-assured despite the challenges.
1. Happiness is not about extremes, but balance
For years, I thought working my dream job would bring me the ultimate happiness. But I couldn’t shake the burnout and anxiety.
Then I thought going all in on travel — the thing I’m most passionate about — would fulfill me. But eventually, the novelty wore off. Exhausted from constantly being on the go, I longed for the comfort and stability of home.
I realized that I won’t find lasting happiness unless I’m living a life balanced between adventure, rest, productivity, and learning.
Patagonia
Courtesy of Helen Zhao
Now that I’m home, I have new career and financial goals. A few years ago, I would’ve sacrificed everything to achieve those, while applauding myself as a go-getter and a hustler.
But now I pace myself and do my best to maintain a personal life and gym and meditation routine. I’m enjoying the journey instead of racing to a finish line that probably wouldn’t be everything I imagine it is.
2. Satisfaction is about perspective and gratitude
I never felt like I had enough success or money while living and working in Los Angeles and New York City. But in South America and Southeast Asia, where I encountered mind-boggling levels of poverty, I realized how privileged I am.
Even many average neighborhoods didn’t come close to my standard of comfort. A lot of the locals I met had never left their country because they couldn’t afford it.
I realized that I won’t find lasting happiness unless I’m living a life balanced between adventure, rest, productivity, and learning.
I realized that as an American renting an apartment in LA, I live an unfathomably luxurious life compared to much of the world.
While freelancing and job hunting in a very difficult market, I was tempted to slip back into feelings of inadequacy. But the perspective I gained while traveling reminded me that I already have — and am — more than enough.
3. Flexibility and quality of life matter more than a dream job
Before returning home, I spent nearly two months in Bali. I found true work-life balance and a magical, extravagant, free-spirited lifestyle I’d never experienced.
I began freelancing and applying for jobs from beautiful cafés and restaurants, while enjoying a slower pace of life, surrounded by lush nature and stunning views.
Bali
Courtesy of Helen Zhao
A few years ago, I felt like I needed a big brand-name employer to define my value. I would have despaired at the rejections and lack of opportunities. But my experience in Bali inspired me to value well-being over prestige and money. I saw what life could be like, and it had nothing to do with a dream job.
I decided to stop burning myself out trying to force my way back to a “perfect role.” Instead, I would pursue a job that offers flexibility and quality of life, while channeling my passion for video journalism into becoming a creator with my own YouTube channel.
I went from feeling helpless to empowered.
4. Real joy doesn’t come from a picture-perfect life
My sabbatical was partially inspired by the travel influencers I followed on Instagram. I was jealous — my life felt lame in comparison to the epic, picture-perfect lives they seemed to lead.
But behind the scenes, globetrotting is a lot messier. You don’t see the burnout, fatigue, loneliness, and sadness many travelers experience.
With her mom in the Vietnamese countryside.
Courtesy of Helen Zhao
After realizing firsthand that nothing is as glamorous as it seems, I stopped aspiring to be like others and began to prioritize my own needs. I decided to sleep in and relax at cafés in Cartagena, for example, instead of hustling to embark on a Caribbean island boat tour I didn’t really want to take. I don’t regret it.
Nowadays, I spend most of my time working on my computer, going to the gym, running errands, and seeing friends and loved ones in low-key places. There’s barely any fodder for Instagram posts.
I see others leading more outwardly enviable lives, personally and professionally. I’m happy for them, but I don’t feel bad about myself. I know I’m exactly where I need to be — no matter what it looks like to anyone else.
Helen Zhao is a former video producer and writer at CNBC. Before joining CNBC as a news associate, she covered residential real estate for the LA Business Journal. She’s a California native and a proud USC Trojan and UCLA Bruin.
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